Dale Carnegie asks, “don’t you have much more faith in ideas that you discover for yourself than in ideas handed to you on a silver platter?” A great way to get cooperation from others is to make a suggestion and let people think out the conclusion on their own. Call it brainstorming, ask some questions, and let them talk out the solutions. People support a world they help create.
This principle is a great antidote to defiance, stubbornness and the complaint, “Don’t tell me what to do!” If we can lead them to be creative and come up with an idea, they’re more likely to think it’s a good one. This principle makes them feel important, so they buy in and there’s less of a power struggle.
Some phrases to help: “Do you want to bring a jacket or a sweatshirt?” “What 3 chores do you want to do?” “What do you think is reasonable screen time?”
The video shows how my client used this idea to avoid drama with her teen. A hilarious and exaggerated demonstration of this principle is from a scene in My Big Fat Greek Wedding.
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